PRAYER

A conversation with God to discover His purpose for me.

Over the years I have come to understand very deeply that much of what I make of life depends on a very simple thing - PRAYER. This word has many notions to many people. Some do it regularly, some sparsely - in times of trouble or in times of need, some as an obligation and some rattle off a lot of words without it having much meaning at all. As for me, since some years it has become a very integral part of me without which I would find very difficult to survive.

There are many forms of prayer; it can be broadly classified as Communitarian (together with a community of people) and Personal. Both forms are very essential and mutually enhance the other but I am going to focus more on the form of personal prayer. There is no perfect method for personal prayer; it evolves out of ones relationship with God. What I am about to share is just my experience and the way I go about it.

Some fundamental aspects

Before I go into the details of how I spend my time in prayer, it is essential to have an understanding of some fundamental aspects which determines the fruitfulness of prayer.

A relationship with God - As I mentioned above prayer evolves out of ones relationship with God. I truly believe that God is the one who created me, with a specific plan and for a specific purpose. The more I seek and walk according to Gods plan and purpose the more I am at Peace and have a real sense of Joy within.

Free will and our initiative – God has created us with a free will, to make our own choices in life. He will not interfere with our lives if we don’t want Him to. We need to invite Him in our lives or give Him the permission to work in our lives and only then will we see the fruit.

God loves me dearly and is deeply interested in me – God does not just create us, then forget about us and let us battle with life in the world ourselves. My experience has been that God although being that magnificent, all powerful and all knowing God, He greatly loves me, is deeply interested in me, is always available and keeps speaking to me through different ways to help me lead a life to the fullest.

Prayer as a conversation with God - In every conversation there are to 2 important elements. Speaking and listening. Most often in prayer people get very involved only with the speaking element and rarely or never with the listening element. As for me I believe the more important aspect is the listening element through which I am able to discover each day and each moment, Gods plan for me, the more I listen than talk, the more I know who God is, how much He loves me and what He wants of me.

God is not only interested in the big things of life but even the little things – God loves to be involved in the everyday affairs of life, he not only directs me with big decisions for the future but even with small things - like the clothes I wear, the music I listen to, the movies I watch, my daily conversations with friends etc.

Having these fundamental aspects clearly charted out in my life, helps me have a very fruitful and effective relationship with God through prayer.

Times of Prayer

If you have read something or heard someone speak to you about personal prayer I am certain that they would have mentioned the need of setting aside a specific time for prayer and finding a suitable place, these are 2 essential aspects to get one started.

You might have also heard of many structures of prayer that one can follow like the ACTS structure (Adoration, Contrition, Thanksgiving and Supplication), it’s a good way to begin with but again if prayer does not contain the listening element, one misses to see the fruits of prayer and soon prayer might turn to be something boring or tough to practice.

What do I do in times of prayer?

My times of prayer is in the night before I retire to bed (although many would say that it is not the best of times, since one is most tired and sleepy during that time), for me it is a time when everything is silent, there no impending work soon after, I can be most free of preoccupations and have the freedom to spend as much time as I want.

I most often begin my time of prayer with an evaluation of the day, starting off from the very beginning of the day. This time of evaluation is mostly filled with thanksgiving for all that the Lord had blessed me with, ranging from specific things I accomplished that particular day to general things that we most often tend to take for granted – like the gift of life, the health, the food, the shelter, the clothing, the nature, my family, my friends, the comforts, my talents, my skills, the knowledge and the list can go on and on. All these together with all the specific events that took place each day can take an enormous amount of time. I truly and sincerely recognize God in each of these things because I believe that He is the source of all good. By this time my heart is already overwhelming with joy for I realize that God has done so much for me, in just one day. This then leads to a time of adoring and praising my mighty God for who He is to me. 

Not all days are so beautiful and rosy to begin with, because there are days where things don’t go too well and I am troubled, and/or angry and/or hurt, and/or failed to do something well etc and these things weigh me down. So the first thing I do is to take it up with the Lord, address the incident to Him, tell Him about how I felt, and then ask him why things went wrong or not as what I expected it to be.

I then listen; it is here that most often I learn so much. Many times when I have been troubled, I have almost instantly blamed or found fault with someone else. Often I have even complained a lot about the person to the Lord. When it finally comes down to listening to what God has to say, very often He has gently made me realize and understand that it was Me who was wrong and that if I had reacted or done things differently, I wouldn’t be so troubled. Just to give you an example to understand things better – once one of my very dear friends and a person whom I looked up to, came up with false allegations and tried to tarnish my image. The moment I came to know of it, it troubled me a lot, I was shocked, angry, frustrated and wanted to get back at that person immediately, thankfully by then I had learnt not to adversely react to any such thing without taking it to the Lord, so I waited for my time of prayer and the first thing I did was to take this issue with the Lord, I was immediately reminded of Jesus’ passion, how He was beaten, scourged and even crucified and yet He did not react a bit but He indeed blessed them . I realized that I dint have to go through any such torture; it was just a little thing of someone talking ill about me. In no time I felt so silly, I was even filled with a love to accept that person and carry on as if nothing had happened. It did not trouble me any more, and much later that person even confessed and told sorry for it. If not for the Grace that the Lord gave me that day to see things in the light of His passion, I would have spent many hours and days ruining myself with this issue.

Coming back to my  time of prayer - after I have finished evaluating the day, thanked God for what He has done and sorted out the difficult moments that I experienced, I move into a time of surrender, renewing my Yes to Him, acknowledging my limitedness and offering my desires, thoughts and very specifically the coming day to Him. I then ask Him if there is anything that I need to do in the coming day. Sometimes yes, He directs me to meet someone or call someone and just inquire about them, sometimes to offer help for a particular person and in all such occasions in the past I have found that the person to whom I was directed to, was in some need or difficulty.  Very often I sense the Lord just saying to give my  very best even in the routine things that I have to do in the coming day - so even in the things like cleaning my room or being attentive at class, I do it with a great amount of Joy and strength. This  period in prayer is filled with a conversation to and fro, like the way one would chat with a closest friend or loved one. At times He does not speak much but He just tells me that He loves me very much, I smile and respond saying “I Love you too Lord,” and I just enjoy being in His presence. At times it is here that I am directed to particular passages of scripture. By the end of this time of having  a conversation I often have action points – things that I am directed to do in the coming day or days.

At some time I offer up people who are close to me - family, community and friends. I also lift up the intentions of people who have asked me to pray for them. At times I am also moved to pray for general needs - for the Church, for the Holy Father and for other issues happening world wide. Time passes so quickly that at times I have to force myself to wind up even though there is an inner desire to continue.

 One thing that I find most exciting is that Gods tells me in advance of certain things that He is going to bless me with and when it actually happens there is such an outpouring of Joy, a sense of gratitude to God and above all a confirmation that God is alive and so dear to me.

How do I know it is God speaking to me?

This is a question that many have asked me before. For me it is a very simple answer, won’t one recognize the voice of someone you love most dearly even if one cannot see the person? It boils down to having a Love for the Lord.

Practically speaking there are a few things that you can do, to begin with. Ask questions: all of us have a lot of questions, about our future, about what to do next, about decisions to make, about the way to react or not react to events of life etc. God responds through an inner voice; not in a loud audible tone but in words or in a language that one can immediately sense in the Spirit. Some term it as “Conscience.”

Now some might sense an inner voice or a leading as a response to the questions that one asks but are not sure whether it is ones own human voice emerging out of ones own desire and will. There is a very thin line between differentiating the voices, so one needs to build a sound foundation with the following pre-requisites first. The voice of God that one senses can never be contrary to the pre-requisites mentioned below. These are the foundations on which our faith is built.

Pre-requisites or aids to listening: Over the years I have built up a check list to help me be sure that the inner voice I sense is the Lords and not my own or of the evil one. I often keep checking myself as to where I stand with each of the following aspects.

The Scriptures: God has already revealed himself to us through the various books in the Bible. It is the living word that is very relevant even today. It is important for us to grow in the treasure trove of knowledge that we find in the Scriptures. Taking for example, if you sense that you have to take revenge on someone for what the person has done to you, then you can be sure its not God leading you because He is a God of love. In the scriptures time and again He asks us to forgive indefinitely and to love one’s neighbor as oneself. Get familiar with the scriptures.

The Sacraments: the sacraments of the Holy Eucharist and Reconciliation are powerful means to be one with God. I draw great strength through the Eucharist (Jesus present fully alive in the bread that we receive everyday at mass). Jesus makes a physical dwelling in me when I receive the Eucharist. One can only imagine the magnitude of this event. The King of Kings, The Lord of Lords, the creator of the Universe and the power of all powers, takes His dwelling in me. For me this is a real super re-energizer spiritually and physically. Closely linked to this sacrament is the sacrament of penance or reconciliation more often referred to as confession.  If I have to receive the Lord of Lords and the King of Kings in the Eucharist every day, I have to prepare the place for Him, I have to make sure its clean and holy and worthy of the honor. This great sacrament of cleansing and healing makes me spiritually anew. I make sure to frequent the sacrament of confession at least once a month

The teachings of the Church: I find in the magisterium of the Catholic Church a very clear way and direction to walk a life that leads to a union with God. There is whole lot of documents coming down from the very beginning of Christianity that serve as an important tool in understanding and growing in a relationship with Jesus. The most recent and profound document one can turn to is the Catechism of the Catholic Church(CCC).

Concluding notes

There are few other important things to note to make the best of prayer and to grow in ones relationship with God.

It’s a discipline to be built: those of you, who want to get started, don’t think that everything is going to fall in place at first instant. It is a discipline that needs to be built up over time. Human desires and emotions often come in the way. Down the road one might notice that one has made mistakes and acted thinking it was God leading. Therefore it is important to keep check on ones motives. ‘Do I do things for my own recognition and fame or for Gods glory?’ The scriptures mention time and again “whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.” It’s as simple as renewing ones ‘yes’ to God each day and submitting oneself completely to Him.

Community prayer: as I mentioned earlier, personal prayer is only one dimension of prayer. The other dimension of community prayer plays an equally important role. The liturgy that we celebrate as community and other forms of community prayer enhances, supports and nourishes personal prayer to a great extent.

For major decisions: don’t adhere to this form of prayer for major decisions in life. Major decisions would need a much more intense process called discernment - containing Prayer, consultation with a spiritual director and a lot of practical thinking. An Ignatian discernment process is what I turn to in such situations.

 Make your life a prayer: prayer should not be confined to specific moments; one should grow in the freedom to turn to God at any time and at any place, even while walking down the busiest street of a city. He is available 24/7. It’s the silence of our hearts and the tuning of our minds that matters.

Amen 

Hope this has been of help, feel free to write in and ask questions or even share your experience of prayer which will enrich us all the more.  You can comment below or mail in to tonyalex61@yahoo.com.